LGBT Wedding bands – What About the Guys?
Like rushing down the aisle without the wedding bands. I got a call recently from Hal & Rick about their need for wedding bands. Between upgrading their new home to be handicapped friendly and finalizing the adoption of their child they hadn’t had time to get married.
Their first thought was just to get two plain platinum wedding bands that matched and be done with it.
In celebrating my LGBT client’s commitments, I have opinions about their wedding jewelry. Don’t be ordinary I say.
Hal and Rick, on a Deadline for Wedding Rings
When we sat down that first time, I queried why they wanted identical bands. Hal said, “With all that’s gone on our rings are just another item to check off. And the wedding is in five weeks!”
I pouted and said, “Your wedding rings will be your most important piece of jewelry. You’ll wear them everyday and they represent your love, your commitment to each other and a celebration that you can legally marry.”
We all got quiet for a minute and then all smiley, because it is great that my gay friends can marry legally. I’m all about celebrating two people who have found each other and want to make a life together. But I digress.
Figuring Out Your Best Wedding Band Look
For your greatest happiness in your rings, trying on different metals, widths and designs will help you find that “you” ring, that makes you look good while rocking your married happily status.
In trying on band rings, we found that Hal looked good in an 8mm width because he has large hands. Rick, with his long piano player hands, looked better in a 6mm width.
Hal it turned out looked great in platinum, but not great in yellow gold. Or rose gold for that matter. Rick looked more tan when wearing the yellow gold. Once they’d figured out their best metal color look the excitement amped up.
Don’t We Need to Match?
Matching isn’t how we say “I love you.” Because you’re each different you each may need different styles with a single cohesive element to join them together.
I pointed out that each of them should be really comfortable in their rings and love the way they looked in design and style on their hands. Hal ended up wanting diamonds on his, black diamonds, because he’s a rebel. We laughed, but seriously he rocked the black diamonds.
Rick liked a distinctive design and really liked my hand engraving. He’s in the men’s garden club, has a gorgeous garden, and he and Hal had met through the gardening club. The floral theme seemed to be perfect for his ring’s engraving. Rick said, “I know it looks gay, but I’m gay!” I love him!
Hal felt since he was going with a different width, a different metal, and diamonds, that he wanted an element to go with Rick’s band. Since Rick was going with a curvy engraving design, they decided on a curved pattern with the black diamonds that Hal wanted. That would be their unifying element.
Happy Wedding Bands
The two rings were made and they gave their vows over them.
Hal and Rick were really happy they hadn’t gone for the, “check an item off the list,” method of wedding ring selection.
Each of you is unique and so should your rings be.
Your Personal Jeweler,
Calla
Great, these are looking so good and design is looking so charming.
Dear Bone,
Thank you for your feedback.
Your Personal Jeweler,
Calla
I read the LGBT blog post about Rick and Hal, and I got choked up by the end. I loved the idea of how different their rings were and how perfect that could and should be. Seriously, I just now took my hands off the keyboard to dab at my eyes with a tissue. It made me think about how “matching” bands can be oppressive, because “matching” really isn’t an expression of unity just as you said in your post. And the idea of such different bands making a statement that was still about their marriage and unity. Thank you… Read more »
Dear Christine,
That you had a reaction like that makes my day. You completely got my message and I’m so glad.
Your Personal Jeweler,
Calla
I like how you chronicled the story of creating the perfect bands with pictures. It helped illuminate not only the spirit of this couple, but also their unique individuality. This was a touching story from start to finish, and an admirably progressive one. Thank you for the sharing it Calla.
These are wonderful! What fabulous symbols of their commitment to each other! Congratulations!
Hi Anne,
Thanks for your vote of wonderfulness! I’ll pass on your congrats!
Your Personal Jeweler,
Calla
What a beautiful story, Calla! This is so great that you are writing about these two lovely men’s wedding bands. I didn’t know if there were any rules of thumb for gay wedding rings. I love that you were able to find rings that fit their unique personalities so well.
Dear Patricia,
In gay wedding jewelry their is as much room for creativity and unique designs as in heterosexual wedding jewelry. I’m loving the different couples I get to work with and all their interesting lives. Being a part of a piece of jewelry that will be worn everyday for love makes my life!
Your Personal Jeweler,
Calla